My Single Mom Journey is a blog series explaining my path to being a single mom (My single mom memoirs). Read the intro to find out more…
How old were you when you had your first? What were you doing before the girls? Did you always want to be a mom?
It is funny how people are curious about my life before the girls…it is like they want to know if you were sane and level-headed before having children. As most parents know pre-children is a completely different story…so here is a snippet in my world before Big and Little K.
In January 2004 (age 28) I was living the life — had my own business, had two gorgeous dogs, and a home that I was restoring back to original state in Rochester, NY. At this time I was about to approach my 4th year living in Rochester…
I’m a born and raised Kentucky girl that packed her bags to live in the northeast to work for Eastman Kodak company (before their decline). Although I held many roles within Kodak — my primary role was a software developer. Unlike what most people think of some single mothers… I am an intelligent female with two degrees in Computer Science, a degree in Adult Education focused in mathematics, and a certificate (basically a degree) in E-Commerce….And to add to that list I have a background in art with a focus in graphic arts and abstract work. My educational background allowed me to start my own web development/software application business…I loved it for I could work with all types of clients, pick my salary, and work my own hours.
So the dogs — Onyx Marie (black Labrador) and Nero (black Akita/Labrador mix) — were my awakening to motherhood. I got Onyx Marie at the end of my undergraduate years…she was spoiled …loved by my family/friends…went everywhere with me…and was not a happy camper when I got Nero. (lol kind of how Big K was when she found out she would have a sibling) I felt bad that Onyx Marie was always alone when I had to work or had to go out of town SO I got Nero…Man those two definitely prepared me for actual children…Onyx would do things and make it seem like Nero did it…Nero was so big and constantly happy that would get into stuff that no big dog should do…And just like my girls they were joined to my hip..they did not take separation very well NOR did they like some of their sitters.
My personal life (yes the juicy parts everyone wants to know)- Due to the location I was constantly traveling to NYC or Canada…I loved being in Rochester and I also loved my stress free, vegan, dreadlocks having, laid-back life…At this point in my life I was semi-single….I was not a Sex and City girl in regards of lifestyle (my favorite show at the time)…but I was torn between two guys…There was ‘Justin’ who I hung out with and talked to all the time AND there was an high school friend ‘Randie’ (Note I am not utilizing actual names). Randie and I talked often and would make every point to see each other when I came home to visit – mind you that was not that often since Rochester got snow and I had to drive with the dogs
Although most females think about that so-called clock ticking I really did not think about children… I had told my family to treat Onyx and Nero as their grandchildren 🙂 But that was soon to change….